Ratchet File #5 - Worn Out, Turned Over Uggs (or Uggs in General)

Like many people of this world, I have pet peeves.  One of them happens to be Uggs.  Be they name-brand or generic, I hate Uggs.  I hate them even more if they look like this...



If someone catches you wearing a pair of Uggs (brand or otherwise) that look like they're screaming "Lawd have mercy on my sole," go find yourself the nearest landfill and bury them (and yourself too, while you're at it).

Yes, for the billionth time it has been said, but they're called UGGs for a reason.  It is because they are Ugg...ly.  Seriously, what type of ratchet ass female walks around...never mind.  I think I know the answer.  Stupid broads who are stans of pop culture and all that other useless bullshit.  But that's not the point.

(You dropped an F-bomb on me)

I'm curious about one thing:  Why the fuck are these dumb ass skeezers wearing Uggs in some fucked-up weather?!  It can be 100 fucking degrees out here for fuck's sake (this is fucking Los Angeles for fucking crying out loud) and y'all got some fucking nerve to be wearing some fucking Uggs out in the fucking heat?!  That leads me to that classic, 2-word statement:  Bitch please!

Or worse, it could be raining like hell and a girl could wear a pair of Uggs, only for them to later on look like a soggy version of that new burger from Jack In The Box--a Hot Mess (Thank goodness it doesn't snow in Los Angeles or else you'd really be shit outta luck).  Just so you know, Uggs cannot and will not protect you from the elements of nature.  You get a little water or mud on them, then...



Yeah...game over.  Uggs are dead.

Also, throw away your Uggs before you tear up your feet.  Let me repeat that again...before you tear up your feet.  Wearing Uggs for prolonged periods may lead to corns, bunions, hammer toes, ingrown toenails, fungus, tendinitis...you disgusted now?  They have no arch support and will splay (meaning your Uggs will look beat up and turned over like your feet are walking sideways on the bunion) if worn for a long time.  So unless you want your precious little footsies to look like your toenails eat cement for breakfast, hang it up.  Your feet will be eternally grateful.

You can start slinging your comments.  What I will not accept is that same old, tired-ass argument that "u jst hate uggs coz u cant afford them," so don't come back to this blog and start crying about a nasty pound of mold growing on your feet because you took your Uggs through Hell and back.